Conversation openings when you meet people you do not know
Ever been to a party? Not know what to say? Been to a conference where you knew nobody? Do we all feel the same when we meet new people?
Finding those opening lines to start a conversation is a problem we all face.
But imagine how you would feel if you could go anywhere, meet anyone and immediately start a great conversation. Imagine you confident you would be when you can talk to anyone, about anything.
Are there any conversation-openers that always work?
While there are no guarantees that everything works, Jill Spiegal, in her book "How to Talk to Anyone About Anything", identifies nine possibilities that are effective. The nine ways to start a positive conversation are:
1. Simple introduction
2. Say something positive
3. Pay a compliment
4. Ask a question
5. Refer to your surroundings
6. Say, "You remind me of . . . "
7. Admit you are nervous
8. Be creative
9. Ask if you can join the group
1. What do you mean by 'Simple Introduction'?
When you start a conversation with others, you should always have a positive mindset. You believe that the other person is worth talking to. You focus on them and not yourself. Your entire demeanour should exude, "I want to meet you. I believe you are interesting to meet."
The simple introduction consists of, "Hi. I'm xxxx. Great to meet you.". Your positive message and body language makes the other feel comfortable and want to respond.
2. How can I say 'Something Positive?
When you say something positive like "Great party" or "Wonderful place", it opens the door to a positive conversation. You create a positive atmosphere. People realise you a re a positive thinker and looking for their best traits. They open up and and give you their complete trust.
3. What are the best ways to "Pay a Compliment"?
Everyone wants to feel special. Starting a conversation with a compliment immediately makes someone feel worthy of attention. Paying a compliment refers to the person rather than the surroundings. Compliment some visual feature of the person (clothing, appearance, etc). Say something pleasant about how the person makes you feel ("Your so amusing" "Your insights are so true" etc) Compliment them on how they look so confident, or so self-assured. A heartfelt compliment to a person can change the situation. Your listener will respond with warmth and openness.
4. How should I "Ask a Question"?
Questions have been shown to be great attention-grabbers. You get their attention immediately. They focus on your presence. And concentrate on an answer. If the question is something relevant to the meeting, you have an amazing conversation starter. Ask if they like the 'venue', or the 'host', or the 'surroundings'. Check if they had a 'safe journey to the meeting' or if they 'know anyone'. Simple questions but wonderful ways of connecting with others.
5. What do you mean by "Refer to Your Surroundings"?
This conversation-opener pays a compliment to the surroundings rather than a person. It can be as simple as "What a wonderful buffet" or "Great furniture". You are both in the same room ,You both see the same things. Your common observations a good way to connect.
6. How do I use "You remind me of . . . "?
When you meet a person that genuinely reminds you of somebody that you know, you project yourself as a person who is sincere. People respond to sincerity and are happy to engage in a conversation. Relate an anecdote about the person you know and this can be a catalyst to a wealth of topics. The conversation begins.
7. Should I "Admit I am Nervous?"
Most of us are nervous when meet new people for the fist time. But few of us are ready to admit it in public. People admire others who have the courage to speak out. They feel an instant attraction - "I am like you. I don't have to pretend that I'm not nervous with you. I like you." The ice is broken. The conversation flows.
8. How can I be "Creative and Meaningful"?
When you are inspired by someone or something, you express your feelings. Your emotions. Remark on the smell of the flowers, the warmth of another person, or the beauty of the furnishings. By expressing your emotions, you have an instant connection with another. Emotions are a universal feeling. Using creative openings can lead to meaningful conversations.
9 What if I feel awkward "Joining a Group in Progress"?
When we are on our own, it is dauting to see a group that seem to know one another and are having a great time. Solution. Look for another group. One that seems a little awkward and there are pauses and silence. This is a group that would welcome a new member. Have no hesitation in asking if you can join this group. The members will welcome you and are usually the easiest to talk to.
Conclusion
I hope this session on how to start a conversation with people you do not know, has been useful. Choose from the many different conversation-openers. Find one that you feel comfortable with. And start enjoying meeting anyone in any situation. You now know what to say that can start the conversation. Every success.
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